Hey Kat! For months, I’ve found myself always running back to this one boy. I know I really liked him, but I also kept turning a blind eye to the fact that he was playing so many games and just leading me on for the fun of it. I would get upset realizing he was seeing a lot of other girls too, but I kept going back to him. Recently, we’ve grown apart because I started seeing someone new— someone who has done everything perfectly. I guess I’m so confused now because I really like this new boy, but the old boy suddenly is trying to tell me not to see anyone else because he likes me. What do you think?
Hey @stand4theflag1996! It sounds to me like the answer you’re looking for is right in front of you. It also sounds like this is a classic case of a commitment-issued, insecure-Snaptchatter who is too much of a coward to admit that he might actually have feelings. If I assume correctly, you and your “old boy” share a Snapchat streak but no substantial conversation, right? But if he really didn’t care, he just wouldn’t respond, right? But then again, when you hang out together, even if it’s at a group party, there is really good convo? Here’s where I end your contemplating. Even though the games you play through pic texts and Instagram “likes” probably make things almost as confusing as Lindsay Lohan’s new accent, you, @stand4theflag1996, have to take a step back and lose the Snapchat streak. Remind yourself of your value. It is so much more than a missed, late-night text or a selfie with maybe not-so-many likes. Someone who truly values you will not ghost you. Someone who truly values you will make sure you feel your worth. And feeling your worth is something that comes with genuine relationships. So toss him! If you’re 21, grab a friend and a bottle of wine to celebrate you taking out the trash. Because, obviously, waiting for “old boy” is like “waiting for rain in this drought—useless and disappointing.” (Thank you Hillary Duff).
As for “new boy,” it seems to me like you’re onto something good. Don’t ruin it because “old boy” suddenly can’t stand the fact that you’re not still at his door giving him attention—it’s a trap. “Old boy” sounds seriously disturbed finding that someone likes you means that you are finally realizing that he’s not what you need.